#2,415: Downsizing

Downsizing - ★★½☆☆
Boy, Matt Damon’s having a hard time lately. As soon as Suburbicon came down from that billboard by LACMA that movies only get when they know they’re in trouble, Downsizing went up in its place. And the sheer volume of trailer plays this thing got. Yeesh. I was willing to go see it from the beginning, and then it felt like the studio spent two months trying to talk me out of it with all their terrible ads.

Speaking of, I think this is the big trend in movie trailers this season: making a selling point out of a moment that the script totally thought was going to be a big reveal. It’s like if the trailer for Psycho wasn’t tracking well and then the whole marketing campaign shifted to be focused on the shower scene. Thor: Ragnarok doesn’t lay any hints that the Hulk is coming, because they thought you were going to be so pumped to see him, and Downsizing was planning on surprising you with the fact that Kristin Wiig isn’t going to be in this movie, which is in fact a shaggy dog story about Matt Damon learning that he needed to step away from his old life of taking care of his loved ones and struggling to make ends meet in his career where he improves his clients’ quality of life, so that he can, um, worry about money and help people, but in a way that requires less specialized knowledge? I don’t know. I had fun in the last act of the movie trying to imagine what the actual scale of everything we were seeing would have been.

Molly's Game - ★★★★☆
I was on board just to go see a couple hours of Sorkin dialogue, and of course Jessica Chastain as The Competent Woman. I think it's neat that the movie is in some ways a sequel to the book. I hope they get an Oscar nod for editing, as well as the inevitable screenplay nomination.

As soon as I heard there would be a movie I was wondering how they were going to depict Tobey Macguire.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi - ★★★★☆
Well, first things first, having seen this twice in very different theaters, I’ve come to a conclusion: I think the first reel is out of sync. Like the whole scene with Hux on the bridge / space battle thing. Just a frame or two or three.

Other stuff: (Caution: extensive nerdery ensues)

- I’m surprised at all the ire. It’s a fun cynical thing to say that of course the internet hates things, but I don’t really understand it. It’s everything everyone said they wished The Force Awakens had been.
- I’m so happy about Rey. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become a weird kind of Star Wars elitist about what was intended in the original movie and so I like the Force being for everyone. I’ve read posts from goofs about how Luke already represented the random anykid using the force, which is true, but that was before 30 years of waxy lore buildup.
- You can draw a parallel between the practical necessity of scrubbing the EU and the line about burning down the past, sure, but that’s not what Ren is talking about. Your Star Wars isn’t gone. You’re not actually meant to destroy the past. Why? Well, there’s this little trick that people who have seen a movie before might be able to pass on, which is that the villain is often wrong. Sometimes art is used to explore a wrongheaded idea or philosophy by putting it in the mouth of antagonistic characters.
- I should probably emphasize that this is mainly in reference to ideas, and not like, every word out of the villain’s mouth. (Although, Iago.) There’s a thing about Empire where supposedly younger children were more likely to think Vader was lying to Luke. I know I was in that camp myself. I’m not sure what it says that it’s apparently such a popular opinion that Rey and Ren were lying about her parents. (That said, if any writer was going ever going to try to pull a reversal here, it would be JJ.)
- Canto Bight. Sure, with the hindsight that the plan didn’t work, you can say they might as well not have tried, but the rebellion is all about making these million-to-one shots. They can’t all pay off. Besides which, embodying the theme of the movie is a worthwhile thing to do in a movie. Do people not like Finn? Isn’t ‘seeing what adventures the characters are having’ another part of what folks want from Star Wars stories?
- On the other hand, the ‘how did Finn learn to fly since yesterday’ criticism is probably a valid one. We’re used to a gap of years between movies, but I think we’re only getting days this time.
- If I were snipping a plot thread out of this movie, it would be Captain Phasma. Is she a popular character? It feels like the Disneyiest, merch departmentiest fingerprint on these movies.
- Luke’s apparition. I wanted to say that it was how Luke thinks of himself, but I think the lightsaber is how we know it was meant to freak out Ben. The only reason I can think of for using the blue saber (besides giving the audience a clue) is that Luke is showing he’s met with Rey. The implication that Threepio can see the projection is really something. That means Luke is doing something to (at least) light on another planet, not just influencing the minds of the people there.
- Force ghost Luke! Luke’s hand should have clattered to the ground. Will the ghost have a robot hand? Real hand? No hand? Why isn’t anyone talking about the real issues?
- I would say that Luke did give Rey the most important training he could have. It’s not like he’s going to be drilling her on EU lightsaber forms. He probably doesn’t even know that kind of Republic era Jedi Academy stuff. Like Luke in Empire, what Rey learns in that dark side cave directly informs her approach to the force and evil and the rest of the movie.
- I wonder if audiences would gasp at Leia getting spaced if Carrie Fisher were alive. Maybe since they know the actress is gone, they’re just waiting for Leia to go somehow. I definitely thought it was possible her shuttle would be shot down until Poe boarded the same one.
- You just know they’re going to jam those dice into SOLO.
- I still like this movie. I liked it more this time.

#2,413: The Last Jedi

The Dinner - ★☆☆☆☆
For a movie with so much going on, not much happens. It’s weird how they landed such good actors for a few roles, then cast the rest with friends of the crew and raffle winners What’s worse, not enough dinner. Fans of The Trip will be expecting to see Steve Coogan pontificating over an absurdly luxurious meal, and in this installment, we barely learn about the line-caught trout.

Table 19 - ★★☆☆☆
Moving along in our tour of disappointing dining (we were hoping to watch a hole week of movies with people eating dinner), this movie is what you might call: not great. Review is one of my very favorite shows in recent memory, and this is directed by one of the creators and director of Review. Andy Daly even has a nice little cameo. Alas, Table 19 has a dearth of acts and a wealth of endings scattered all throughout. It gets better once they escape the horrible wedding, but not by enough.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi - ★★★★☆
Wow! Well, this movie is certainly less ‘fun’ than 7. I think that’s fine. 8 both advances the story and checks a dozen boxes of picky complaints people have had about 7 or earlier movies. I once spent a weekend hanging out with Rian Johnson and we talked so much about Brazil – I was so happy for him at all of the nods in this. I mean, it’s practically sacrilege that someone gets a throwaway line and doesn’t use one of the Star Wars Numbers, it’s 27B-6! And the magnifier in the throne room! My biggest disappointment was that the audience in my sold out screening was so quiet. This movie has big surprises!

(Second biggest is I caught on to a thing at the end really early. I bet it's more fun if it blows you away.) sure I’ll be back to see it again next week sometime. Can’t wait!

#2,410: Lady Bird

Bad Genius - ★★★★☆
Mostly great high school heist. The last act drags a little.

The test taking scenes are so much more engaging and suspenseful than anything I’ve seen lately. This would be a great double feature with Justice League for people who are always shouting about the importance of Stakes.

Coco - ★★★½☆
Certainly it fits into my top 50% of Pixar movies. Very glad it wasn’t another sequel. Outstanding third act. Interesting choice to just kill the dog.

FWIW, I saw the version that didn’t have Frozen on Ice at the beginning. Shame that a Pixar short didn’t get made instead.

Lady Bird - ★★★☆☆
In much the same way that a lot of things in the current cultural moment are not about me, I am happy that this exists but I didn't connect with it as well as I did with some other recent high school movies. This isn't how I happened to grow up. Still, I sure liked some of Lady Bird's decisions and definitely disliked others, and I could probably say the same about my high school aged self.

I do feel like I probably need a rewatch to pick up everything Lady Bird was putting down, but also that I'm probably not going to give it one very soon. Alas.

However, this was the best movie I saw this year that was directed by a woman. Of the 90-ish films I’ve logged so far this year, not limited to 2017 releases, I’ve seen 7 directed by women. and 4 of those were documentaries.

#2,407: Justice League

Roman J. Israel, Esq. - ★★★☆☆
Feels a little like Denzel’s Monster, he's out to win some prizes. I kind of wouldn’t’ve minded seeing the ‘before’ picture, where Roman Israel just does a lot of skillful lawyering.

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri - ★★★½☆
I think this is a movie that wants to remind us to imagine others complexly, and that's a reminder we could really use right now. Maybe all the time, but also right now.

Sometimes, I think I review the advertising instead of the picture. After all, I've probably logged more time watching the trailer for Three Billboards this year than I did watching the film. I'm really glad there was more substance to the movie than what was on display, and that kind of sums up the whole thing.

Justice League - ★★☆☆☆
I try to be an optimist, but DC doesn’t make it easy.

Diana: I like that she spams her finishing move all over the place. It's like the ‘why not start with the giant robot’ problem. But she seems dumber now–like I know we have to keep referring to ‘a pilot she once knew’ because someone in a meeting gave a note that JL should tie into the other movies more, but from her perspective he died a hundred years ago. They only spent a week together. I think it's fair for her to move on.

Superman: Some of the whedonisms were even more jarring than in Avengers because we’ve already established these characters, and Zach Snyder’s Superman isn’t particularly jokey. There’s room for all kinds of supermen, but please pick one.

Most of the time in a Superman movie, there’s never a sense of just how strong he is. Is it difficult to catch a space shuttle? Or to lift an island into space? It's great that we see him casually flying that building around just before doing something he finds difficult.

Also, raising the dead is surprisingly simple!

Flash: He's the fun thing in the movie, much more appropriate as a Whedon-y character. I liked when they did that super-speed scene from X-Men, and the race scene. The first time, at least. Why would you put it in the movie twice?

Cyborg: in the interest of brevity, he sucks.

GL: I was wrong. I thought this movie was going to pull an Iron Man Three-style double bluff where *obviously* Superman comes back, but that distracts all the nerds from the real reveal - The introduction of one of the space heroes halfway through the movie. Preferably a Green Lantern whose interest is piqued by Darkseid’s bad behavior. We had a GL in a flashback, but that’s not the same. I bet he was in an earlier script though. Otherwise, unite the seven what? It's not seas. This is not a movie about the sea. Aquaman, while present, didn't even have a character.

#2,404: Murder on the Orient Express

LBJ - ★★½☆☆
This is the Greatest Hits of Lyndon Johnson. All the things you know about him. All the popular quotes and stories. You’re welcome, high school history teachers.

The Whole Truth - ★½☆☆☆☆
Forgettable despite the barrage of Shocking Twists.

Murder on the Orient Express - ★★½☆☆
It’s still technically period, but the story has been wrung through a modernizer, maybe one borrowed from Guy Ritchie. We’ve got new scenes to demonstrate Poirot’s badassery, and much fancier exteriors. It does make me want to go watch the Lumet version again.