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Written by Rob Schultz (human).

#2,367: Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

Nuts! - ★★½☆☆
So this is the documentary (which was itself based on a book) that was the basis for a podcast that has been optioned for development as a movie. Ultimately, I was a little bit disappointed - in part because I was hoping there was a lot more to the story that I hadn't already heard in other forms, and in part because some of the art styles just aren't my bag.

Aliens - ★★★½☆
This is the one Alien-franchise movie I know I've seen all the way through before, and I was surprised at how much I'd forgotten. The manner of the traditional long, slow build-up. The way everything keeps getting worse. The part where Ridley is crucified for our sins. Wait. No. That's Christianity. I always mix up Christianity and the film Aliens.

Shimmer Lake - ★☆☆☆☆
Points for effort, but this wasn't so great. kind of feels like something you'd stumble over on deep cable. Or a Sci-Fi Channel original if there had been any sci-fi elements. Although the fact that the story is told backwards probably did make me more interested in watching this, the gimmick isn't used very well.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2 - ★½☆☆☆
Right after viewing, I figured it was probably better than part 1 because it bothered me less, but on reflection the sequel is probably the worse movie. It's pretty long given how little happens, and of course, because it's a comic book sequel, it's the 'what if they lost their powers' plot. In this case, that means we split up the team. You know, the team we spent a whole movie getting together, the one where everyone made the same speech over and over about finding their family? More like the team who all go on separate adventures in the sequel.

I've heard the original described as "Star Wars for a new generation," but Volume 2 feels more like a Trek movie to me. It's slow, it's mostly guys standing around talking instead of exploring space, and the wily and reckless captain has to face off with a weird, cosmic consciousness and its machinations.