On tonight's all-new episode of ‘Hoisted!’

“Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick was indicted on perjury and obstruction of justice charges after a series of romantic text messages were acquired from backups supplied by the SkyTel pager network, a contract granted by the mayor himself for reasons including SkyTel's touted archiving features.  When reached for comment, Kilpatrick reportedly said, ‘Ouch, my petard!’”